Thinking Shoulder Pads

Swedes party like it's 1976

2010-06-20T05:51:00.000-07:00

Yesterday Crown Princess Victoria married her long-term boyfriend.
She looked so beautifully happy, so radiant and full of joy.

See?
It was a lovely day all round, not least because she married the man that she loved, despite all the pressures of family, state and society.

One thing that makes these Royal events more fun to look at is the clothes. I'm not going to spend the rest of my evening posting pictures of royals (especially as I'm 5 pages away from finishing one of the best books i've read this year-more on that to come) but I did want to post this of Princess Mabel of Orange-Nassau. Mabel has had a colourful Royal history-her husband gave up his place in the line of succession to marry her after the Dutch Parliament refused to support the marriage.
Apparently she's big in European NGO work (including War Child and something called Elders). She's also a muse of Viktor & Rolf (They did her bow-laden wedding dress) but that doesn't justify why she wore this to the wedding.

It's like something Old Gregg would wear: a sartorial downstairs mix up.

Schland, oh Schland

2010-06-20T05:08:00.001-07:00

Now that Germany has won Eurovision (only its second victory and its first since 1982), its footballers have been put on notice.
After coming third on home soil in 2006 and losing to Spain in 2008, Germany has high expecations of its players. Especially after beating Australia 4-0 last weekend. The Serbs put a spanner in the works there (ouch Klose) and the final group matches are even more important than usual.
But enough about soccer, let's look at the latest attempt by the Germans to merge aspects of culture: Lena + vuvuzela + referring to Deutschland as 'Schland' = a man in a black dress with a wig singing about Germany playing in the world cup.
It's really funny, well mostly, and well-written. Apparently it's really popular too, having become (According to Deutsche Welle), the 'unofficial [German] World Cup Anthem.'

I'm back Madge.

2010-06-20T04:50:00.000-07:00

My goodness. Such a long time.
So much has happened since Norway won Eurovision last year. wow.
Let's look to this year, with Lena winning for Germany, for the first time since 1982.
I also really quite liked Moldova, especially the sax bit, made me feel like being a German jazz club in the early 80's (though that makes me sound rather like Howard Moon).
And, how could you fail to be moved (positively or otherwise) by the brilliant Milan Stankovic's Ovo je Balkan?
He's definitely an acquired taste (sartorially- he seems to have had a run in with his hairdresser)- but this was one of the catchiest songs of 2010.
So let's look to Germany 2011-will it be in Hamburg of Berlin?

Oh it's the final. FINALLY. SPOILERS

2009-05-16T10:44:00.000-07:00

So....
FINALLY 3am has rolled around and i'm still here to blog it. Oh i'm tired though! We thought it started at 2300, but it turns out that that's 2300 Moscow time...SO much for the moment guys. I wonder how far i'll get, but i'll try.

Dima's here, clad in white (as usual), singing believe. THe other two guys from last year arne't there. He's wearing a white zip-jacket and te zips are black. Apparently he also ran through paper but I missed it, MTV, despite having blanket coverage of Dima, life story bio etc blaring for the last 6 hours (Except for an hour playing Dr. 90210)
oh, he's going into the air! ANd now it starts...
There's some other guy, Ivan Urgant and Alsou, who sounds like she should be working for E!, making small talk about the warmth of MOscow. Now they're going through the voting: start please!
Oh good,enough of the smalltalk and on to the artists (can you tell i'm craving sleep: have gone from drinking CHigingiss to black tea):
1. Lituania: Sasha Son: Love
Man in trilby singing at the piano, who is getting better as the song goes on. IT's ok... kinda like a ballad but I'm over it. He's got fire in his hand now. CHEESY. he's clearly ethnically russian as he is busting it out.
2. Israel: "the most politically correct entry" according to Andrei, semi final host. Oh, we're nervous today, but then they get their confidence, zip up corset/dress things are a bit strange: you're not meant to see the zip.
The song is fine, doesn' mover me like Boaz did, there's lots of singing to each other, face stroking, hand almost-touching and striding up/down the stage, oh there they go playing the biscuit tins as drums again.
3. They really dont' waste time between the entries, right now that is FINE by me!
FRANCE. oh, im' excited, she looks so classy and reminds me of UTe Lemper. PAris 2010? Prolly not, but we can enjoy.
Simple, she's standing on stage by herself, rahter odd one-shouldered dress, oh it's VERY chanson, i'm glad she's singing in French again, oh there are subtitles in lots of languagtes, english, russian, swedish, it's like the opera.
I have a feeling the jury will make things a bit more objective, well i hope so. I really hope so, diasphoric voting is just ridiculous, and makes it all a waste. This will always exist to some extent but it had really taken over the contest, and made it less about the songs, than about relationships and movement of people between countries. oh ted's messaged me.
4. SWEDEN
Always LOVE sweden (Hero was SUCH a highlight: Charlotte wuz robbed),
Started off operative, then the manadotry swedish electro/euro pop verses. back to opera bits...
What are the feathers that she is wearing at the bottom of her dress?
Oh the backling singles have bejewelled masks: Die Fleidermaus this ain't. KAtherine Jenkins will be counting her chickens before they've hatched and is already putting up her hand for 2010 (perhaps) after seeing this.
5. Croatia
Black-clad BAlkan schalger. Slow-mocing backing dancers/singers try to be sensual. Do something new. I'm going to the toilet (having seen this so many times before). Alright i got distracted texting, but it looks like Croation Sophie Monk has come out, glad in shiny white (and breezy) Swarovski to help. Not really working. Toots off until the ad break.
6. Portugal: oh i liked this, as usual, it's all very innocent, cute and sweet. Same SJP circa 2005 flower corsage in her head. Oh the Accordian! Love the flowers as the background. Everyone in the Portugese entry is SO happy! Life is so fun, happy and a ukkulellee will make everything better! It's cute, it's sweet but not powerful enough in one direction (As ballad, pop song etc) to win.
7.ICeland
Oh i always love Iceland, particularly Silvi Night. My niece also likes Yohanna, I think i do too. SAme dress as the semi-final, very economical of you, though I suppose right now they have the same budget as Moldova. Oh it's a good song, feels like a real one that you'd hear on the radio.
Why has she sewn small things on her bodice? And what is hanging from her armpit?
There's a cellist, some back singers with severe shoulderpads and nice Nordic smiles.
I'm trying to put my finger on the genre, it's not Delta-style, not inoffensive enough, not Celine (bless the 1988 winner), can't think.. but i'll get ther...
8. Greece
Sakis, (2004 entry, 2006 host) is back with a song co-written by Kikorov, the great Russian songwriter. He's obviosuly got lots to prove. LIke wearing tops is something he doens't need to do. He wore white last time, He can dance, a bit and that's what he's working with 'cos the song doens't really say much. Puity this isn't the Eurovision dance contest. He's on a...an sort of travellator: obviously the gimmick is working. The dancing is becoming slightly more sophisticated.
KEY CHANGE! first of the night, oh how i love them, Sakis, you're getting slightly more bonus points witht aht key change, oh and we saw your niplle, you're mcuh more comfortable sans top aren't you?
His travelator has turned around and opened itself, lifitng him into the air.
9.Armenia
I missed these guys in the semi final (thanks stream) but i've got them now. Fire, people cavoting around in a group, ethnic-clad sisters. Oh, they're all on a bed. THeir outfits v. ethnic. Two sisters singing about people (lovers) being missing on a bed? Sounds, soundsl ike they're not aware of the overtones they're making.
Ok we're back in Armenian , snazzy ethnic influenced dancing. The outfits remind me of the film Octopussy, i almost feel like they should be doing gymnastics over the audience and save the day. Good, if not a bit... without meaning.
10. Russia.
I hope she moves tonight.
Huge reception from the crowd, even though she's singing about her mum in Ukrainian.
And her face is the background and she looks like she's going to cry. and wearing a white strapless gown from the beautician. How not to try at winning Eurovision: sing in Ukrainina, come straigh from the beeautician, unconvincingly sing aobut how much you love your mum, not move your lower half (though she did bend forwared a little bit) and look like you have gray hair, oh wait, the background images are making her look older, like her mamo.
She has a good voice, but after Dima last year, this is a lesson in simplicity(oh we just screamed!! Anastastia, not me!) but boy do the crowd LOVE it.
Big voice at the end.
Can we have an ad break please? I need to get my charger.
11. Azerbaijan: Always.
Flexible dancers to ethnic-esque music. Silver bangles, bitd of fire.
Schmick. they want Baku 2010. She has one gold legging on. Her voice is a bit off, but maybe she's weighed down by all those silver bangles she's wearing. He looks like he's nicked Dima and SAkis' whites (ueber starched) and teamed it with a military jacket.ok they've brought out an ethnic guitar. Fireworks, oh so 2008 but we'll still love it. They want to do well. It's ok. Looks slick. It's amazing what some good dancers can do.
12. Bosnia and Herzegovina. Nearly half-way. Brilliant.
Regina,
aaah, the schlager people. Already writte on this, BALKAN SCHLAGER/off to war opera song. no you are not Marija, do not try to be.
ok there was an ad break, and an ad for the sequel to night at the museum, and we're back. BTW the streets of Ulaanbaatar are bare. No snow today, unilke last night.
13. Moldova
there are LOTS of people in the audience.
Ethnic garb (this isn't a bad thing, just a note) oH GORGEOUS Dirndl-esque outdit, love the purple and green combination.
Now we've got something that sounds almost like the Cat Empire with 4 ethnic-clad men dancing arm in arm. Lovely fabric images as background, she's having fun, and frnakly who can begrudge, singing and dancing with these guys? I'm not really listening to the song (am more drawn to her over-the-knee purple (suede?) boots) and can't udnerstand it, but those men do sure kick high!
it's fun, happy and i want it to do well!
14. Malta
aaah chiara, third time lucky my dear? Well the Russian friend at the start of your entry was Skiaza [sic] menaing fairytale, so not so sure you will be my dear. You do look lovely in your sparkly dress. Good song, but not quite Eurovision winning material. have been forgetting to take photos. oops!
" if you don't knoy your destination" Head moves and trying to be a bit funky (and me failnig to be more original in describing that move: hello, it's 4am and i'm fuelled by green tea!)
15. Estonia
oh my tea is hot, i like it. What is a Gagarin (that was Estonia's word)? Is it reference to Yuri, or jsut something else?
She's clutching a violin and wearing sequins: is she Vanessa MAe? though her frock is long. More cello and other string instruments. Is classical to trend this year? Well we are going back to partial jury voting, so anything is possible. It's good, oh she's playing, is it a viola? didn't impress, didn't dislike. middle-ground. still on for iceland...
16.Denmark
Oh this is a favourite according to many people, and Boyzone (host of the 1997 final singer Ronan Keating wrote it) gosh he sounds like Ronan Keating: crazy! I miss the Olsen brothers.
oh this is good! This is the kind of up-tempo that Eurovision loves, it's very happy scandanavian. Imitation really is the sincerest form of flattery. fireworks!
aaaah there's even the ubiquitous "pseudo heavy" scandi rocker in the band.
Can't understand waht the commentators are saying: not much it seems. talking about germany from what i can gather.
17. Germany. With dita von Teese as a blatantattempt to et votes.
tight silver pants? You are not Vince Noir!
Oh there's Dita! and two other women actually doing dancing moves. Dita's jsut sitting on top of some black lips,
Oscar is ok (he's american you know, the german is the guy playing the piano released a song called "you've got the most beuatiful arse in the world").
he's tapping. Dita's moving. all she literally has done is get down off those lips, walk around, look at alex, turn around, bend over, sti back on top of the lips and..... play with a whip. She has a very small waist. hm, i'm not sure what i think, it's not really a Eurovision song in the traditional sense, but then that's all changing so much at the moment. i hope it does well so Germany will send good people in the future, but a bit too much kiss kiss and no bang bang.
18. Turkey.
Germany and Turkey next to each other? Who would have thunk it?
Dum tek tek... Hadise gives good performance, i like that she is normal size and can move her belly (Though nearly every turksih entry does that). I can feel the rhythm in your heart, and the subsequent rhythm in my head thanks to the song.
19. Albania Ikra (caviar) was their russian word.
Ok,
there's a gumby-esque man with a sequinned bface dancing behind our girl, who looks a bit like NIkki Webster. Ok the backing dancers have joker faces!
Cute, o, home to bed with you!
20. Norway
Another young'un (though this one was born in Belarus) this is a good song, even if, at 18 he's making lots of assumptoins about life, love and memory. My friend described it as sounding like a folk song but in english.
oh he has bushy eyebrows. he's so sweet! Maybe he'll meet the ALbanian entry and then they'll be back in 2 years to sing about their relationship?
I don't know if he's playing the violin live.
The dancers are excting.
Backing singers have some nice dresses, but why the walk across the stage: coudl it have been made as a movement?
21. Ukraine.
Oh wait, Alsou is back and wearing a white bow on her shoulder. Ivan is trying to get things going quickly. This i am impressed about.
Now it's time: the clip fo rthis is all about melted chocolate and not much.
Ok. we're dancing (with the splits) on something our of donkey kong, there are some roman centaurians, with not much on.
Over the knee sequin boots, red stuff and not much else. Thrusting! THis is clearly quite about.... more than just getting a red rose from a man. Though i am impressed by its message of three men performing on demand for a woman. Even if she has to objectify herself to make it happen.
how old is she? She looks of indeterminable age... good for her, she can obviosuly keep up with the men!
Even had a bit of a drum!
BIG budget Ukraine!
22. Romania
Balkan girls.
great. You read my view on these "girls" in the semi-final. On a secodn listening, she can sing, but.... why perpetuate cultural stereotypes?
bit of an ethnic dance. not a fan.
23. United Kingdom
Finally, it's their time, and witht eh help of Sir ANdrew Lloyd-Webber, the UK wnats to show it means business. AND, Russia has come to the party, with even Putin plugging it. It was ALL over Russian TV tonight.
She's kneeing?
Where's andrew? Just violinists, but she's doing well. Lots of bling. Oh there he is! Playing piano with lots of coiffed from the trump school of hairstyling.
Whenever I hear this, I'm always waiting for the key change/up-tempo change but it doesn't come...Maybe that's just me.
ROAR from the crowd.
Huge applaus
24. Finland
Their Russian word was Na Dzrovie! love it!
This is a great song. Fire from teh start, men in tattoo shrugs, rappers, women in mini dresses (VERY short) at least the main singer wore tights, thank you for showing some decorum and not your bits.
It's getting light, at 4:40am. I'll never get used to the early summer mornings in the northern hemisphere.
Such a huge stadium. I really like this song, even if the male rapper looks a bit dodgy. He's wearing his cap back to front.
More fireworks, key change. Those fire twirlers are still going.
25. Spain.
oh, one more song: Spain! That's everything in less than 2 hours! I suppose the Russians want ot get things done quickly, they started teh show at 2300hours local time.
Ok she is dressed like a gymnast/ballroom dancer; lots of dancing. Typical of previous spanish entries, group dancing. ok it's good now that she's gone alittle into english. incidentally, TVE (spanish tv) had a special on Eurovision tonight whilst we were trawling for some coverage. it revolved aroudn soraya singing whilst dressed incredibly daggily. i can't believe it's getting lifht!

oh, i see costume change, i think! and the backing dancers get their chance to shine. you get a pass guys. Um... no costume change, she jsut morphed somewhere else. Good useage of the space.
well done, better than for a while guys.
So...hosts are back, Alsou is looking nice in a red dress, (third costume change), making banter about balallaika. ha ha.
bring us the recap! I love the recap! am i actually going to stay awake for the whole vote?
Oh, they're talking to someone on the International space station. I think someone else has done this as well one year. aaah, they launched the voting.
RECAP.
We've had the recpa, now we're "going on a tour around Moscow with the participants." One guy brought his accordian. The woman is trying to dispel negative myths about Russia "people overseas also try to drink," ok i can't really understand the English b/c the russian commentators are getting in teh way.
Ok we're back in the green room with that guy, what's his name again? He's drumming up support for votes. More recap.
My initial analysis is... I think there's a big divide between the A group and the B group, but some random countries are back in the B group this year. No song (apart from Iceland) has really grabbed me and said "favourite," but then my view isn't often indicative of the pan-European continent.
What will the interval act be? It's always something "now" Ireland did Riverdance, Denmark did (the not-so-new) Aqua and now we've people dancing in water cells, dancing on the rood. it's called Fuerza Bruta. ok people attached to one side of a piece of plastic, then someone below them.
More water, swimming, dancing.
I have to sya, this is very haute culture.i like it. i had expected a bit more of the semi-final with military band, previous singers, but this, this...is really classy. People are really getting into it.
now more people swimming, i think... the wimming pool has gone from the roof to just above the audience, people are touching the bottom of it. i wonder who was involved in this. crowd love it. OH&S? Dancers are jumping and throwing themselves about on the plastic pool it's going back up no.
Ad break.
OMG Raiffaisen Bank (swiss bank FYI) has a eurovision credit card. Give it here!
OK, Svante Stockelius is back, slightly different hair to the first semi-final.
Woah, the interval was WAY short! i could get to bed before 7 at this stage.
Ok Spain: 12 points: NOrway 10 points: UK
Belgium: 10: points: Norway, 12 points: Turkey
Belarus: put your puppies away, you're there to give the vote! Only 8 points to Russia! 10 points: Azerbaijan, 12 points: Norway!
Malta: traditional attempts at talking and giving 2 cents on tonight. 10 points: Uk 12 points:L Iceland. good move valetta!
Germany: 10 points: Turkey, 12 points: Norway
Czech Republic: 10 points: Azerbaijan, 12 points: Armenia
Sweden: 10 points: Iceland, 12 points: NOrway
Norway is ahead....
Iceland: 12 points: Norway
France: 10 points: Israel, 12 points: Turkey
Israel: 10 points: Iceland, 12 points: Norway
Russia: 10 points: France, 12 points: Norway
Latvia: 10 points: Estonia, 12 points: NOrway
Montenegro: 10 points: Norway, 12 points: Bosnia and Herzegovina
Andorra: 10 points: Norway, 12 points: Spain
Finland: (who is giving the votes, nice checked shirt big guy) 10 points: Iceland, 12 points: Estonia
Switzerland: 10 points: Portugal, 12 pooints: Turkey
Bulgaria: 10 points: turkey, 12 points: Greece
Lithuania: 10 points: Estonia, 12 points: Norway
United Kingdom: 10 points: Norway, 12 points: Turkey
FYROM: 10 points: Bosnia Hezegovina, 12 pooints: Turkey.
Tension-building commercial breka (i'm quoting here).
Ok Norway is a good song, but I'd dearly love Iceland to win.
We're back.
Slovakia: 10 points: Norway, 12 points: Estonia
Greece: 10 points: Norway, 12 points: UK. Closing the gap
Bosnia and Herzegovina: LAKA IS GIVNG THE VOTES. i love this man! He snubbed me at the after party though. 10 points: Norway, 12 points: Croatia
Ukraine: 10 points: Azerbaijan, 12 points: Norway
Turkey: (looking very yulia Timoshenko) 10 points: Albania, 12 points: Azerbaijan.
Albania: 10 points: Turkey, 12 points: Greece
Serbia: 10 points: Norway, 12 points: Bosnia Herzegovina (featuring the hostess from last year)
Cyprus: 10 points: Norway, 12 points: Greece (this is one of the great constants in Eurovision)
Poland: 10 points: Ukraine, 12 points: Norway
The Netherlands: 10 points: Azerbaijan, 12 points: Norway
Estonia: 10 points: Russia 12 points: Norway
Russian commentary just said "predictable"
Croatia: 10 points: Azerbaijan, 12 points: Bosnia Herzegovina
Portugal: 10 points: UK, 12 points: Moldova (random).
BTW, the sun is up and it's shining.
Romania: 10 points: Iceland, 12 points: Moldova
Ireland: 10 points: UK, 12 points: Iceland
Denmark: 10 points, Iceland, 12 points: Norway
Iceland is cementing second place
Moldova: Azerbaijan 10 pooints, 12 points: Romania
Slovenia: 10 points: Bosnia Herzegovina, 12 points Norway
Armenia: 10 points: Greece, 12 points: Russia
Hungary: 10 points: Azerbaijan, 12 points: Norway
Azerbaijan: 10 points: Ukraine, 12 points: Turkey
The Russian commentators are saying thatr Hadise looks like Shakira
norway is up to vote, the guy is dressed in traditional dress. Revel in Oslo 2010
10 points: Azerbaijan, 12 points Iceland.
And with that, Norway is the winner of the 2009 Eurovision Song Context with a record 387 points!
Congratulations Norway!
Congratulations also to Iceland for a gret performance, and to the UK for getting back into the Eurovision friendship group.
Poor Finland, it was a good song.
Norway are coming up to perform. I'm going to post this now.
Alexsandr is speaking Russian to the audience. He's about to receive his award. Dima's there, bad hair and purple suit and Lys Assia is also helping out. Oh, Dima and Alexsandr are talking.
Now he's speaking in Norwegian.
And playing.
I'm off, it's 6:10am.
Thanks to Ted for the company and ascerbic dialectical analysis.
Thanks also to Onoran for their wonderful company; food, drink and fabulousness.
Baka!

Blogging the semi-final

2009-05-12T12:12:00.001-07:00

Ok here we are... at 3am to blog the semi final...
Am tring to stream it live from the Eurovision.tv website but it's slow and not working very well.
Here we go:
I've missed the first people: mOngtenegro
Czech Republic is on now, but it's going in and out... they look like a bunch of random children's performers having a play on stage.
Oh, something's on it's Belgium, looking rock, 50's almost jive with what looks like a red and a pink drag queen in the background. It's fat old Elvis. Somehow, they always get it wrong, or at least they have since Kate Ryan.
Bits of Belarus now, all long hair shaking around 80's style. With white clothes...
This really isn't working, maybe i should have stayed in bed
Sweden: looking like Charlotte Perelli, blonde, tight dress with slight back-up dancers, oh there's an operative trill, wish this connection would actually work and i'd get more than 5 seconds
Armenia, strange duet, feels late-80's early 90's Shakespeare's sister-style. With green lasers.
It seems this will be the best i can get, it was going well, then I got an error message grr.... SO annoying! will have to do something else for Thursday night
Andorra look like ABBA with guitars, they sound like them too.
HA! Octoshape's server is down.. HOw surprising!
Turkey now, hm... hope the song is better than when i saw it last: about 3months ago. Well it is , the size of the stage certainly helps.
one of the backing dancers ended with the splits. ouch. huge applause.
Israel: sombre, black-clad woman, ah she's joined by another woman. nice song, none of the shivers up the spine that Boaz gave us last year. oh, using gold biscuit tins as drums now!
There must be another way guys!
Natalya looks good, slightly older than usual, Andrey also looks good, black and white. She's got BIG hair and is doing the french part (a bit badly, but no worse than the hosts from previous years).
Oh the green room attendent (i think they mean journalist): he's not being ironic.
FINALLY after 10 songs, i may have real streaming! don't want to jinx it.

what is this intro? crazy building in a woman's hair?
ok... Bulgaria: Krassimir, Krass indeed. The backing dancers wigs give the First Lady of Cameroon a run for her money. Oh he's going all opera... It's like some strange 60's Hollywood genie-fest. With whizzy-dizzy's on stilts. No Nono, please no.
Iceland: I always love iceland, have ever since they had the worst hairstyle ever (Redhead guy, sang in 1986 and 2007. yohanna: starts off with cello, cute blonde chick who looks like she's walked off the Neighbours set. it's an o song, but has none of the catchiness of previous years Europop entries. Unlike last year, this won't be playing in a gaybar at 3am. Despite this, it's ok.
Am i losing the stream? OH NO! DON'T DO THIS TO ME!
OH, we're back! thank goodness!
this is actually a good song! I wonder where i can buy the album in Mongolia? She should get throu through. despite diasphoric.
aaaa FYROM, the country who came so close last year, would have got through if the jury hadn't picked the brilliant Hero by Charlotte Perelli.
This year (looks like) brothers with matching 80's rock frizzy perms, who need to, to quote Australia's Next Top Model judge Alex Perry "make friends with conditioner." Mate, there's no use signalling them to clap and sing along if they can't understand what you're singing! They look like they're having fun, even though it's all inoffensively stuck in 1987. Quite catchy though.
oops, I've just realised that I had my headphones in the wrong jack and may have woken the whole house up. Oops!Another building on the head of a woman?
Romania: "The Balkan Girls" Where the Cheeky ones in surgery?
Oh no, she's jsut singing about them, further perpetuating a cultural stereotype: Balkan girls unwind with gin, tonic and lime.
Or maybe she's just funded by the Balkan Tourist board?
Her "hips are ready to glow" and she's looking for a man to be her Prince! You might as well come out with a plate of Borek and be done with it now.
Oh, now some trad ethnic dancing, and we've jsut lost the stream.
FInland: Waldo's people. oooh i like it! Good change from the heavy metal of the last threee years for Finland. Some Gallon drums with fire in it, oh and a puny-looking guy looking V. mid-90's.
Oh i like it!!! lots!
Fire twirlers with fake tattoo shrugs. phew. I love how the Nordic nations feel comfortable enougha bout themselves to put non-coathangers in short/tight dresses and pull it off. props to them. i like this song!
Ah the keychange, first of the night that i've noticed (have only caught everything since Israel: will be setting the player up earlier on thursday)!
Slightly warm reception: neighbour stuff?
oh, we're back to (let's not includ ethe definite articles) Green room. He's telling us how to watch on the internet: no don't, then the stream will go! No!
oh the cd AND the DVD. i want it! HE's getting all telemarketer on us and "begging" us to buy it.
ok Portugal, the country who have been in it the longest without winning: every year i think, come on, it's your time, and then they do something dumb/conservative/highly flammable/out of touch.
maybe in 2009?
NO, not if the sing in Portugese. Oh wait, could be ok, she's got flowers in her hair.
She's cute. there's an accordian.
I like it, oh, folk-dancing twirl. Love the bit of ethnic, such a standard in the ESC. No punani flashng this year, (POrtugal aren't going to up the ante with that one, this ones pure and sweet) but there is a cheery man with bongo drums.
She kinda looks like Adele, she's good. i hope they get through. wish they'd come out and stun us and win one year!
They looked like they might last year, got a RIGHT cheer in the hall, but then.... obviously diasphotic voting kicked in, not that we can begrudge Dima.
I feel like i should be at a port town drinking some wine or caipherinia.
Get through, please
I'm viewing this in the small box so i can jump to the blogsite and type...
oh Malta...
Chiara..
third time lucky?
this woman can sing, but... first note off she's nervous. there's HUGE expecation in malta for them to win: come on hon, you can do it! has she lost weight since last time? Not sure, but the dress is much more flattering, black with beading down the middle.
it won't win, but it should do well, at least make the final.
she's into it now.
oh, we're funking it up a little!
Gosh we're nearly finished, t goes so quickly when it's jsut the songs and no interludes time wasting things!
no, she's good and she should get thorugh. that's what the maltese will expect.
So now Bosnia, such a gorgeous place!
And special to me (and Kate?) after meeting Laka last year and then visiting it.
Oh no, we're back to white-clad Balkan schlager IT DOESN"T WORK! Marija mnanaged to transcend the genre, but that's 'cos she has an amazing and moving voice. This sounds a little like an operatic aria with the marching noises in it: as though the hero is bidding his woman farewell before he goes off to war. Which, given they're all wearing white woolen long coats has probably happened.
DON'T LEAVE ME STREAM!
oh good you came back!
no it's gone now! bum!
oh we're back briefly, Natalya with her british accent: can you jsut stay for the recap stream?
Andrey looks a bit like Bruce Forsyth. She's cute. V. cute.
recap, bits of it: montenegro: fast, catchy
czech: random, like a children's performance
Belgium: rando as usual

the others are a blur
Switzerland, usual, the greased hair and black leather jacket.
Turkey: not upsetting the Raki cart.
Israel: ok, but Boaz was amazing so it would be hard to top that
Bulgaria: Speaking of top, this is the top hair!
So it looks like people have come back online... GET it together, ESC people want to stream!
I am SO sick of this error message! now i've missed some songs!
Romania: Balkan girls are conforming to a cultural stereotype
Finland: i'm in, i want it, i like it.
Portugal: cute, v. cute. i want them to do well!
Malta: She's got a big voice; she always does ballads, third time lucky?
BiH: war opera.
Oh we're back with the hosts...Andrey just called NAtalya Natasha. oops.oh we'redoing a points recap from last year: what a night that was! oh and Euro 2008: this is the year Russia won stuff: miss world, ice hockey, wonder if they'll put bits of Georgia in the clip?
No, they didn't. but maybe on the domestic version.
OMG Andrey just asked Natalya why he could trust her with such important matters as voting?
ok Recap AGAIN. i'm taking pictures.
Armenia is strange: why didnt i atake aphoto! swiss is a bit rocky.
Oh the camera's jsut died so no pics of Balkan Girls. you all know what they look like anyway.
Ok, they're back: in the crowd, Natalya has NEVER been in a more exciting place in her life. Not even the Chanel Haute Coutre show? Or the Louis Vuitton campaign, or the birth of her three children. I like her though and given she's never presented before is quite natural. perhaps b/c she can actually speak english as opposed to jsut reading autocue liek other past presenters.
ad break. ok we're back. maybe this is just for us and the crowd.
Military people, gypsy theatre and military music "from Russia with love for you Europe."
A military choir, a smiley man in ethnic garb and a balalaika. The choir's singing in full uniform: still from the parade?
Military man singing in white, singing traditional Russian songs.
Oh now some trad. ethnic dancers are coming into position.
This isn't about nationalism or asserting the cultural significance of Russia across Europe is it?
ok Baishte Military man.
Think I know this song, oh it's the song about the Katusha rocket (i think), well they are in uniform. Some of the people have medals on their chest. Do you think they get them for choir attendance (i joke, i jest).
it seems any attempts at dissent are not taken lightly, stream's gone.
Oh, new military man singing trad songs, aaah the gypsy dancers. "Lai lai lai lai" song. It could almost look spanish except for the slavic moustaches and the military uniforms.
Ok... young people breakdancing to trad military songs. And a young man who may be about to split his pants...
Red flags in the air: military drummers, this is really cost-effective, they're using the same guys from the May 9 parade. The drummers are pretty good. Now there's some techno and T.A.T.U are here singing "not gonna get us." We're not gonna get you live honies, and we haven't since your disasterously out of tune performance in Latvia 2003.
Oh the Military choir is singing backing harmonies!!! WATCH IT FOR THIS! What would ALLA P think?
now we're looking at the big 4 and Russia:
france looks all class, a bit Ute lemper.
Russia: sweetheart move on stage. catchy.
Germany: all kiss no bang me fears. Though Ditta von Teese is apparently going to be on stage.
UK: is it your time? sounds like a phone ad. will ALW be playing on stage on saturday?
Spain: Take me, shake me? she looks like Finland 2003: Addicted to love. meh.
Ok... come on, give us the songs!!!
Here they are:
Don't look if you want to know, kittens.
Natalya jsut keeps smiling.
oh, they're going to Svante Stockelius, who's a redhead this year.
Push button technology replaces the envelopes:
first country through to the final is...Turkey (no surprises there)
Then... Sweden!!!! YAY! Good work guys: Hope you'll do better this year now that diasphoric is OUT
ISRAEL! Good work guys!
Andrey you can't get political! He said " the most politically correct song gets through to the final" Possibly not allowed!
Portugal's through!
Malta: after a shot of Chiara looking disappointed, she's got reason to smile!
Next through is... Finland! Thankfully there's a bit of taste this year!
Natalya is getting a little brattyabout pressing the buttons " I don't press buttons on the catwalk, i press buttons outside the catwalk. Where are you buttons Andrey?" "I will tell you after the show" RIGHT
Then... BiH!
Romania is through.... to perpetuate cultural stereotypes in the final
Armenia, sisters clad in ethnic garb are through!
Last country is ICELAND! FABULOUS! That's three nordic countries and some big guns.
They're all on stage. and it's over. I'm going back to bed.
Natalya said baka!
dasvidanye, baka from Moskau and UB!

Snowstorm on Victory Day

2009-05-10T07:30:00.000-07:00

Entschuldigung.

I know that I haven't written at all since I came here, but now I may make up for it.
Yesterday was May 9, otherwise known as Victory Day.
I watched, as requested the Victory Day Parade from Red Square (Putin looking like he lost the battle with the sunbed, Medvedev not impressed by P's permatan). It struck me how much the Second World War is part of the European psyche in a way that it's not in Australia. The war has many different meanings in Australia: migration, displaced persons, Holocaust and camp survivors, these stories are really individual, family or diasphoric ones. The overarching narrative of the soldier seems more about fighting in the First World War, but then that could just be my interpretation of it, especially given my background and how the war impacted that. Again, that's a European connection. Australians don't usually celebrate the end of the war, both in Europe and the Pacific, there's no parade like there is on ANZAC day.
It's therefore always striking to see how present the war remains in the psyche of Europeans. Even though there's not parade like in Moscow, the Germans remember it as the day of liberation. But the military parades are obviously quite moving for an Australian who has nothing of this at home: old veterans on the sidelines, young people and families in the crowds, politicians observing from above and then masses, masses and m asses of troops, missiles and tanks making their way through Moscow. It's immense, powerful and a little eerie.
In Moscow the sun was shining and the blue sky in contrast to the bright colours of St. Basil's cathedral in the Kremlin. It coudln't have been more different in Ulaanbaatar, the only similarity being that the trees were green.
It was snowing, wet and windy, brilliant weather to be watching a parade five time zones away.
Here are some pictures from the day (of the weather) from the living room:

The girl who went into the cold

2008-11-08T02:08:00.000-08:00

Mongolia: land of the big blue sky, Soviet-et architecture and not of Mongolian beef barbeque (this sentence sounds much better if it's hummed to the tune of Genghis Khan's Moscow, another 'Mongolian' entity which is actually completely unrelated to the country).

Having been here almost 6 weeks, I have accrued quite a few pictures. Here are some of them:

Most Mongolians live in gers, portable felt and wooden houses. They have been springing up throughout the city as nomadic peasants move here to look for work throughout the Winter months. They're quite cold inside, and people heat them with wood, coal or rubbish.

This causes much of the pollution in Ulaanbaatar.
They can be ornately decorated, and quite beautiful inside.

The new and special Beatles statue. Please note the authentic windows, heater, guitar and tiles.

Here's the other side of the Beatles statue. L-R: Paul, George, Ringo and John.
It's kitsch.

Beached whale statue outside Tenghis Cinema.

Where there's a whale, there's a way.

My building! It is over 100 years old, so predating the Soviet presence in Mongolia.
Our office is in the bottom left-hand corner, and Melody's office is directly above.

The view from my bedroom after a recent snowfall. Love the socialist play equipment.
The Ger is where the construction workers (see the brick "fence" below the basketball court) sleep, live and eat.

You got Style 2#

2008-07-04T09:02:00.000-07:00

Well, actually you don't.
If European fashion is the barometer of style, then we are definitely out of sync with the rest of the world.
Surfer stuff aside, Australians can be pretty stylish people. We love a bargain, don't shy away from vintage, and generally don't look too boring or skanky. We have good-value, interesting fashion available in a number of different price ranges, which means everyone has the opportunity to dress well.
Not so in europe, where there is very little available between the mass-produced H&M, Zaras and Mangoes of the continent and the super teuer "400 Euro for a jacket" type of fashion.
And boy can you tell.

Another difference is purely a regional one. What is cute, different and retro in Australia is just what normal middle-aged women wear in Europe. Take the high-waisted denim skirt with a tucked-in shirt that i often wear. At home this looks like i'm channeling East German factory workers, taking the prescribed elements of official socialist dress (functionality, not-too-showy, but with a small amount of denim allowed to appease the masses) and placing them within the Australian fashion discourse. The resulting look is a bit retro, different and unusual, a bit 70's and feminine yet assertive at the same time.
(Shit with that sentence I should work for Anna Wintour. Hell, I should BE her: I have a bob, am known to be rude in the morning and have big sunglasses.)
Whereas in Germany, I just look like everyother middle-aged shop worker. Not quite the same look that I was going for. Especially when people tell me I was meant to start at 9 when I go to the supermarket.
P.S. it's nice to be back in the English-speaking world. Not least because the English, unlike some of their EU counterparts, can actually dress (and UK customs quizzed ME on arrival in Terminal 5!).

Ich hab' noch einen Koffer in Berlin 1#

2008-07-02T13:23:00.000-07:00

So I've just spent a month in Berlin, where I studied (along with other fabulous people) many moons ago.
When I booked my flight back to Berlin (Malev via Budapest: is it too much to ask for an airbridge? Actually Malev, when JAT do airbridge and you don't, then you know something is wrong with your service), I was excited: "woo! a month of party in Berlin with all these crazy people from before and more randoms, woo!" but as I was sitting Sarajevo Airport checking out the duty-free selection from afar (which I can tell you took all of 1.5 minutes), this changed to "shitt, I forgot to close my bank account and now i owe the Deutsche Bank 300 Euro, I didn't return at least one library book to the Stabi, the Deutsche Bahn were threatening me with legal action (don't ask, it's a ridiculous story of the differences in German thinking: german academics, instead of teaching German Humour, you should teach German Logic, with an optinal second semseter for the mathematical analysis of this phenomenon (did I just tell a maths joke: oh)), but most importantly, will Berlin and I still share the same love and precious moments that we did 3 years ago?"
The answer was, like yeah, totally, or, given that this is in theory a travel blog and occassionally warrents some kind of cheesy travel pun "auf jeden" (Berlin for of course). I even landed at tegel, my favourite Berlin airport (Schoenefeld just hasn't been the asme since Interflug stopped using it as its him), and Lorenzo, maker of the best pasta that doesn't have a chef's hat of Michelin star, was a fabulous porter. we used to live together (with Benni), where we all ate a lot of pasta, drank a bit of red wine and avoided cleaning the floors together. Lorenzo decided that life in the centre was getting a bit too hard, and moved back to surburbia (Siemensstadt (Siemens is company, they make electrical things like telephones and machines and...shit. Not anything bad or crude mind you): near Tegel and far from Potsdam) to write his PhD.
This resulted in us "grilling," using firestarters (those things you used to put on the barbie before everyone went gas) and something which resembles Allfoil. Tasty, nice crispy flavour. We also had some DELICIOUS pasta, am regreting my lack of photo-taking of it. I do not, however regret asking Lorenzo very politely (more than once) to make some pasta for us after we'd been out ("it'll be cheaper than a Doener, and less fattening, but only if there's no cream!"), I would even eat his pasta for breakfast.
I did eat very well in berlin, but... that deserves a post of its own (and a facebook album: Wir lieben lebensmittel if you haven't seen it).
Anyway, I have to go to sleep now and wanted to write more, but this will have to be a teaser for one of the many Berlin posts (i know I have posted on it already, but this time i'll go further into depth) of the future.
I'll leave you with this food for thought: Should airbridges, like toiletry kits, be a right not a reward when travelling by plane?
Discuss.

Leave me alone

2008-06-24T16:06:00.000-07:00

People are weird. It's a fact.
My Grandma used to say the following: " All the world's queer except thee and me, and even thee's a little queer."
See? She was old, she knew things.
As a traveller, this saying holds true. Constantly seeing new things, countries and cultures means coming into contact with the foreigners who live there (duh). But also the tourists who, like you, are flocking to, let's say Dubrovnik, to see some church which is 1500 years old. Or to Belgrade, to see the grave of the Marshall Tito (or all his presents, they were massively cool).
Anyway.
As a foreign western woman, travelling mostly by myself, I've copped some strange blicks from some even stranger looking folk throughout my trip.
Many of these, such as the "What on earth are YOU doing?" look (popular on the underground with a middle-aged or older crowd) come down to breaking some kind of unspoken cultural rule. Such as blowing ones nose on the subway in Japan, a bit strange given that it's perfectly acceptable to vomit in the street there. Ditto having a quick wee.
When i visited the golden temple (it's big, it's gold and there's a lake around it. enough said.) in Kyoto, a group of country kids on a class trip ran up to me an asked me to be in their photos. Strange. They'd never met a Gaijin before. Odd.
They were nice, except their teachers kept pointing at me.
Dirty old men.
There are unspoken rules on the underground in Germany too. Everyone pushes past each other as they're trying to get on and off the train, but you're not allowed to ask someone to move over. People in Germany appear to have no shame in looking at someone, I kept meaning to stare them down. Of course it doesn't help that I occasionally wear ridiculous clothes (NOT the jumpsuit yet, but I will!), such as stripes and other patterns.
Many Germans are really nice though, in ways that are often surprising. Offers of help, travel advice and food recommendations have abounded. Sometimes it's ok to be a woman travelling by yourself.
Sometimes it's not.
Last week, as I ventured out East to the Berlin-Museum Karshorst (to the Russian-founded "Museum of Capitulation"), I got stalked. Some strange German guy, (who may or maynot have spent tiem in jail) decided to follow/give me a tour of the museum. It was founded by the Russians, to teach East Germans about the crimes of Nazism. Against the Socialist Motherland, but that's another story. There was a place for the Holocaust and other persecutions, but as usual with Soviet/former Soviet histories of the war, the focus is on the suffering and subsequent victory of Socialism over facism.
This guy pointed out all manner of random shite whilst following me over 16 rooms, 2 floors and three exhibitions. He laughed at my BVG suggestions, aghast that an Australian could know the Berlin train system better than him, and was disappointed that I did not share his fondness for Soviet tanks.
I eventually ditched him at the train station,but not before a strange bus ride and an invitation to "stand outside the Foo Fighters concert to soak up the vibes" followed by a ride home on the train together.
Needless to say, I jumped on my city-bound train, jumped right to track 19 of Disc 2 of the 2008 Eurovision cd and vowed never to visit a military museum without my own Soviet tank again.
Strange people, it seems, are everywhere.

You got Style 1#

2008-06-14T14:49:00.000-07:00

Just a heads up chickens that there'll be some fashion posts soon. Critical they may be, but German fashion is too hilarious not to write about.
Ditto Balkan style, which obviously takes it cue from nouveau-Russian riche.
Goodnight.

World in Motion (Euro 2008)

2008-06-14T13:45:00.000-07:00

I like football (soccer). I've always been partial to some English Premier League (EPL), ever since my father sat my brother and I down in front of his taped copy of the 1998 FA Cup final and told us with almost religious reverence of the importance of Dennis Bergkamp and Marc Overmars in helping the Gu
Though he neglects to wear his suit jacket most of the time: the first time I saw it on was after the 1-2 loss to Croatia (no mis-counted yellow cards this time, though Bastian Schweinsteiger (yes it is a ridiculous name) was sent off for a dodgy, but-not-that-dodgy challenge), though I think it was just to hide the shame of visible sweatpatches on international telelvision.
I would have covered up.

In fact, most of the coaches are pretty well dressed. All of them wear suits (or at least shirt and pants), except the Spanish, Portugese (who looks like a squashed version of Gene Hackman-that's what someone told me and I find it potentially amusing enough to share it with you) and the German coach of the Greek team Otto Rehhagel, who spends more time on the rug on his head than on picking something nice to wear.

The matches are pretty good too. The Dutch are playing VERY well, and have won their group. The Stimmung in Germany is that the team (their time) can go all the way, and it's really interesting to see how EVERYONE is transfixed. The streets, public transport and shops are all empty, even when Germany isn't playing. You can even buy red-black-gold leis, in addition to all the usual "official" pallaver. The official chef's cookbook is alright, but not as good as that of Matthew Hayden or Glen McGrath.

There is a lot of red-black-gold around the traps at the moment, sport is one of the (very) few means which Germans can express their sense of national pride without evoking the past. Balconies and buildings (residential, not official) are covered in the national flag (though there are lots of Turkish flags as well, and a good assortment of Croatian, Polish and Russian ones too), everyone is talking about it, and all (a bit of an exaggeration) the men are wearing the national kit.
Is anyone excited about it at home: are some of you staying/getting up to watch the matches?

There is even a musical sub-genre used during these large sporting events. Each country has their own national song for the tournament. I think I've heard the German one, by Markus Stanzi. It's not very good. The press don't think so either, as they prefer to play 'Football's coming home,' which is amusing given that 1) it's an English song, written to reflect their claim to 'own' the origins of the game and 2) even if the Germans wanted to send football 'home,' they couldn't, 'cos England didn't even make the final.
They also play New Order's World in Motion (the English song for the 1990 World Cup) and the Austrian song 'Fieber'(not to be confused with the Peggy Lee song of the same name) a bit, though there's lots of chanting. And
I think that EURO2008 is better off without England in it. For one, Cristiano Ronaldo is officially the most preened person in the stadium, an unthinkable feat in the presence of the English WAGS. And David Beckham.
Go Sweden and Germany: let's hope your failures in Belgrade bring success in Wien!
I hope Sweden are listening to Hero, I think it's very motivational.
Tally Ho.

Europe's living a celebration

2008-05-24T04:10:00.000-07:00

Yes it really is. And in the interests of doing the second semi-final justice, I'm going to write about it soon.

Yes, very soon. But not today, as I`m tired, in Berlin and the final of Germany`s next top model is on tonight (true, but am actually not that interested in it).

In summary (because that`s what I know you all want) Eurovision was fabulous. It was amazing. It was a bastian of kitsch, nationalism, hope and european integration.

I think I`m still processing everything that happened.

Anyway, I think it`s best to chart the night through photos:

Leaving Rome on the way to Belgrade (site of the bad plane karma) I strayed upon this high-quality airline.

I`ll certainly chose them the next time I need to visit the former soviet Union.

After arriving in Belgrade I took a taxi to the city, whereupon I strayed upon the Embassy (5.5/10 for including remnants of socialism) and my friend Kate.

She showed me the posters for Eurovision (or Eurosong, as it`s called in the Former Yugoslav Republics):

Paint was a big theme of the contest, used in the posters, costumes and in the little 30second bits between countries to show the next one that was coming.

Probably `cos it`s cheap.

Despite this, none of it was used to spruce up the city.

The Beograd Arena, on the other had didn´t need paint.

It is made of concrete.

Here is the stage, which, as I have already written, look quite similar to the Finnish one last year. Perhaps it was part of the 2007/2008 Finnish Aid Budget.

We had a pretty good view, except when the sknaky hostesses (trust me, you`ll want to see THOSE pictures. Especially you Nina, with your bad fashion requests. You shall not be disappointed) stood in our way, waiting to be chatted up by Serb men.

I`d like to say that these women were grumpy because of all the chatting up going on in front of them, but frankly I just think it`s because they expected a socialist singalong.

And maybe some Tito.

Ok so there aren`t any photos of the actual acts, there are some good ones, but they just aren´t clear enough (wow! Worked out where the apostrophe is on the keyboard) so we´ll jump ahead here.

After Russia had been `crowned´ winners (Henny, I´ll leave you to comment on the status of that) there was an explosion of tickertape (and interactive display: at last!) throughout the Arena.

We felt like were in the middle of an American Political convention (though I´m sure no one in that country would be celebrating a Russian victory unless it were for being top of an E! news-esque `From Hero to Zero: How capitalism robbed these countries of their superpower status´), everyone so happy and jolly over the outcome. Would have been very different if say, Albania had won. They received a VERY chilly reception in the hall, as did the Albanian vote-reader when announcing the votes.

When the night officially ended, we begun our new quest along the Holy Grail continuum: the trek to the after party. Located at the Save Centar (basically a flattened version of our dear old Palast der Republik painted blue), it was the place to be. Apparently. So much so that it took nearly an hour and a half for the stars to appear, I´m sure not all of them were at the press conference for that long. Perhaps they were, actually really knows?

First to arrive was the German ban No Angels. Pretty much the German Bardot, these guys won the inaugural German Popstars, and had massive success with their 2001 hit `Daylight In Your Eyes´. Then, as per manufactured pop-schmalz group, 5 became 4. And A-List became C. They split up and people forgot about them. The Blonde one repeated history and spent her years judging future failures on the German popstars, there were Playboy shoots, babies and the Bulgarian one (Lucy), came out, jumped off a big diving board and now judges Bulgarian Idol (not surprising that they gave Germany 12 points then).

No they´re back and hardly anyone at Eurovision cared. If you really wanted to win guys, you would have got a Russian or former Yugoslav team member: they bring MULTIPLE country votes with them.

Here they are, talking to the German media about how surprised they are that they did so badly.

It´s not so much as they did so badly as their current geo-political diasporic position.

I could go into further depth here, but I might save it for an ARC grant application.

Another person who had good reason to be disappointed ( and shows how good a sport he is that he turned up to the after party) was the British entrant Andy Abraham.

He´s so disappointed that he refused to show his face, instead having the strange smiling-guy shadow him.

It wasn´t a bad song. Sounded a bit M People (thanks Kate), and was definitely better than many of the songs that did better than it.

Another example of the diasphoric voting.

One of our goals had been to meet some acts, and after these two near misses (and another one with Dima) we sucked up our nerves, got out the chutzpah and went on the prowl.
We met the Wolves of the Sea, the Latvian entrants. As you can tell, the chick in the ballroom dancing dress is fresh from fighting a losing battle with the solarium. My pale skin weeps for her (but not for her dermatologist, who may retire on her treatment costs), but they were quite nice.

We also met the songwriters who told us to support the song all the way to Australia (which will take a long time if they travel by sea), I´ll handball that task over to the Cultural secretary.

I really how much these people understood us when we were talking, there were a lot of quizzical looks, even when we got out the Australian flag.

Strange.

The man below definitely fits into that group. Maybe all these people learnt Russian at school instead of English or maybe they are just random.

It is fair to say that we swamped Laka (he of the Timb Burton-esque Bosnian entry) when all he wanted to do was smoke his fag in peace. However, he was not receptive of our Australian flag (perhaps he should have been: a Danish man working in Balkan post reconstruction told me that Australia is one of the top-4 destinations for Bosnian post-Laka should listen to OUR diaspora) and we thought he didn´t understand us.

He also may have been the only straight man there.

Then we looked on wikipedia and he lived in New York for two years, so maybe he just didn´t like us?

sob.

I even bought his album.

We also meet hte Lithuanian entry, who was REALLY nice and stuck around and partied with the fans, like all good Eurovision singers should.

I´m going to leave you a picture of a stuffed Zucchini from the`famous´ Writer´s Club in Belgrade. Kate didn`t think this place existed, and after eating this gemütlich image, I bet she wishes it didn´t.
Tally Ho.

What's another year?

2008-05-21T01:19:00.001-07:00

So the first semi-final was on Tuesday, and Kate and I sat down in front of RTS we were, I'll have to admit, a bit underwhelmed by the whole thing (Yes I know, it rather goes against the grain, but...).

I've just read that Julia Zemiro will be the commentator in Oz and i'm not sure what to think. She was born in France so has the potential to know more than Des Mangan, who was... well he only lasted one year. SBS should stick to the Wogan commentary as long as he's willing to do it (which might not be much longer if the UK don't do well).

As usual, the Eastern European songs dominated, though there were some doozies which weren't part of Kate's top 10. Our favourites were Ireland, B & H (Bosnia and Herzegovina idiots, it's a country not a brand of cigarettes), Andorra and partially Azerbaijan.

Herewith some songs:

Montenegro: Dean Geyer look-alike with foppish hair singing a very unimpressive (and probably Balkan-friendly) song. It was hard to concentrate because of all the leather on the stage. Surprisingly, didn't qualify.

Israel: Co-written by Dana International (who, according to Wikipedia has just given birth to a baby with the help of 'groundbreaking fertility treatment' (this I find hard to believe, but please, prove me wrong)) loud, dance number sung byu a very happy Israeli singer. Qualified

Estonia: You can tell that they don't want to host it again. Three middle-aged comedians wearing pastel suits dancing incoherently did not bode well for a good result. Nor did it happen.

Moldova: To be honest, I think they should have spent the money on Eurovision tackling the trafficking problem within their country. At least the entry this year wore clothes, unlike last year's Britney Spears meets Vanessa Mae entry. Didn't qualify.

San Marino: Does anyone care about an Italian-language pop/rock band singing for a country that, whilst debuting this year was never really going to make an impression? Try again next year.

Belgium: Kate and I really liked this song: in a bid to country the whole Flemish/Wallonia rift that results in each region sending a singer every other year, this group made up their language. It was a cutesy song, a bit Alice in Wonderland. Pity no one was ever going to vote for Belgium. Didn't qualify.

Azerbaijan: A bit strange, a sort of fire and ice dance troup singing indiscernable (despite claiming to be in english). Kate loved the kitsch factor, I thought that was being a bit nice. Qualified, perhaps on the back of the CIS vote/debut factor.

Slovenia: Note to Rebeka: multiple costume changes are, like, SO 2007! I don't think we need to say much more about that.

NOrway: Surprise packet of the night, the Norwegians must be investing lots of money in Eastern Europe, because we didn't think that the song was... sung live. Unless there was a delay (highly likely apparantly) in the sound, she was lip-synching. It was ok, passable, but not as good as other songs that missed out. Qualified.

Poland: Need you ask if this song qualified? Despite the fact that 1) the woman couldn't sing english, let alone speak it, 2) she was out of tune and 3) looked like a cheap knock-off of Donatella Versace, the Polish diaspora kept her in with a chance. We will unfortunately be seeing her on Saturday night.

Ireland: Now this song, by Dustin the Turkey was a huge pisstake (up there with Stefan Raab's 2000 Wadda Hadde Dudde da), but it didn't pay off. As in 2006, when classic barrel of laughs Silvia Night was booed by anappreciate Greek crowd (who didn't get the joke), Dustin's attempts to verarsch himself, his country and the contest were not taken with the requisite shaker of murray river sea salt. Despite this, Kate was underwhelmed, I was a bit perplexed and neither of us could understand the Irish accent very well. Didn't qualify. Note to Ireland: next time send a 'uman.

Andorra: our favourite song of the night was never going to do well: liek San Marino, who gives a shit about this tiny fleck of Jamon sandwiched between France and Spain? Gisela's had EUrovision experience, singing in the memorable (to some of you) 2002 Spanish entry 'Europe's living a celebration'-perhaps as the blonde who couldn't dance.

The song was good, she could dance last night, the costumes a bit random but not too odd and it was a good Eurosong. A victim of the oft-ridiculousness of the popular vote.

In an interesting aside, many Eurovision fans (mainly from Western Europe) are now increasingly vitriolic at the public vote concept. I say suck it up and deal with it: let the East succeed in what the West really, to be honest, doesn't really give a shit about anymore. That's why the UK sends randoms instead of Take That, the Sugarbabes or any of their successful girl/boy bands. It's why Spain consistantly sends entries who won't sing in english, look nice or even be good.

Anyway.

Bosnia and Herzegovina: Best quote of the night (not that i could understand the Serbian commentary, though Kate offered snippets such as "Greece, a true friend of our country") was the call: "It's Tim Burton does Eurovision." And seriously, it was. Old women knitting in hoop dresses were a bit corpse bride, then Bosnian Helena Bonham-Carter (BHBC) came out singing pretty in a little frock/tutu thing. THEN Johnny Depp came out in a green velevet suit. It was cutesy, and just a wee Charlie and the Chocolate Factory. Thankfully they got through: no one wanted to see another Bosnian defeat on Serbian soil.

Armenia: Andrei, please don't be mad at me, but, it really wasn't very good. I think you'd do much better if you didn't sing slow, emotional songs about things which only people in Armenia know about. Like the disputed region of Nagorno-Karabakh, how long your surnames are and how beautiful yerevan is. All things are legitimate comments, ideas and facts, but nto for Eurovision. It should be about dancing, and showing off all the tassels in your three-tone Zaraesque dress. Still, you're CIS and that's why everyone loves you. See you on Saturday.

The Netherlands: Having spent the weekend with a Dutchman (this sounds like the beginning of a bad joke), I had a little fondness for Hind's song. What little remained 48 hours later dissolved in a puff of [something] when she blended in with the stage. WHy would the organisers do something like that (it happened a few times)? Conspiracy? Stranger things have been said about the Eurovision. This brings us to:

Finland: They love heavy metal in Finland, so it would seem logical that they send a heavy metal band to the contest. Alas, I would put it down to the old adage of "We can't be fucked hosting it AGAIN, so let's send something that definitely won't win". Finnish rockers with waist-length hair, tight leather pants and no shirts wouldn't necessarily endear themselves to 'the' Eurovision, but hey, I'm not european so what do I know? They didn't anticipate it either, 'cos they were pretty surprised that the voting preferences of half of Europe branched from Balkan schlager to include bad Finnish rock.

Romania: As ususal, they include some opera person, a duet, all laden with black velvet and some heavy-but-not-actually-that-heavy breathing. It wasn't very interesting. Maybe they will be better live on Saturday. They qualified

Russia: Dima Bilan (nee Bladin, he lost his name in a contractural dispute with his record company) came second in 2006 with a song most notable for the ballet dancer emerging from the grand piano (white) at the end. After this acheivement, his dress sense went the same way as Russian democracy, and he was photographed with his jeans (tight) stuffed into his boots. I'm all for brining the horse course to the party, but Dima just looked confused. Eurovision can bring on existential crises I'm sure.

Anyway, top the dancer-emerging-from-the-piano-thing he did. With both a violinist AND and medal-winning Olympic figure skater on stage with him (and some ice for the skater) Dima sung. Yup, pretty much that's all. I wrote before that he topped 2006. Well, kinda. He topped it the kitsch stakes, but I don't think the song is that good. Well, most of Eastern Europe disagreed with me (but then they voted for Putin, so who's the better judge of character?) and he'll be singing on saturday.
Greece: the last song(finally!) This chick, Kalomira was born in the States, so she sounds like a pachy-keen version of Britney Spears. The best thing about the song are the lyrics: 'i'm not easy but i'm true.' Often the non-english speakers really get the syntax/grammar/etc wrong and that's ok, well understandable, because they don't speak english everyday. But this chick grew up in the States, so at least she'd have to have SOME command of english: at least enough to make singing those lyrics inexcusable.
In the final though. gags.

Ok, there are the songs.
Tonight is the second semi-final! That is exciting, I think it will be better than the first one, and not just 'cos we're going. Kate has a costume now, Roma clothes. Apparently, the Roma take clothing and other things that people put out with the rubbish, and sell it. All of the ones yesterday spoke German (which was slightly disconcerting, given we have this perception that English is the dominant second language), and proudly showed off these German clothes. Actually quite good vintage stuff.
Photos will follow, I guarantee. How excited are you?

ciaoski darlski

Flying the Flag (the airline post)

2008-05-20T04:56:00.000-07:00

Given I've been on the receiving end of some pretty bad (well not THAT bad, but it's not over yet so I don't want to jinx it) plane karma, I feel it's only necessary to write about it.

Before I write about interesting stuff, I need to externalise the bad plane-karma that has somehow come my way (why I'll never know: what did I do to deserve this?).

I'm now in Serbia, and have stopped off twice to get there. Only one leg has gone smoothly, and I'd like to put that down to Nordic efficiency. Perhaps.
Anyway, my Jetstar international experience was bollocks.Instead of flying Syd-Osaka, I had to fly via Cairns (never a choice destination for... anyone really) and then to Japan, which meant i missed my connection in Kyoto and was nearly stuck at Kansai International Airport overnight. Jetstar were bollocks. No help. So, as if you needed any further proof not to fly them, well, then, there it is. The staff on the plane were nice, but as with all budget airlines, there's a certain "almost-but-not-quite-as-good-as-the-full-price-version" about them. Ditto the food, colour-scheme, tickets and seats of the plane.

So, after a night in Osaka (thank you Comfort Inn) and the complsary visit to Daimaru, i was off to Kyoto.

The bad karma stayed dormant for my flight to Europe: the Finnair flght was great, ok service by an older Finnair crew who were the air hostess equivalent of hefty middle-aged soldiers. Lots of finnish design though: even the paper cups were Marimekko prints!

The flight to Helsinki was mainly full of Japanese package-deal tourists who were very quiet but couldn't read numbers in the latin script. Helsinki airport is a very modern airport, with lots of great shopping, though I wouldn't recommend that you fly Finnair with that in mind (it is however, a pretty good airline).
Rome is actually 3 hours away from Helsinki: no I didn't think it was that far away either.
Woah, this post has turned into a lot of nothing hasn't it?
Well, the next plane trip i took brought back the bad plane karma, so that's at least a bit more interesting.
JAT airways ("it's not called Yugoslav Airways anymore: our country doesn't exist either") flies out of Terminal C at Rome's Fiumicino airport. This terminal is a bit like if the UN had a political grouping called "Eastern Europe and Others": it's for intercontinental and pov-country (aka those not within the glorious boundaries of the Schengen) flights. So flights to the States, Israel, Japan, South-East Asia(long-haul) were lumped with those going to Tunisia, Egypt, Kiev, Chisinau, Turkey, Serbia and my personal favourite, UZbekistani Air. I'm so grateful that the breakup of the Soviet Union brought these colourful airlines to Western Europes shores.
The JAT plane was old. I think it was probably older than many of the cast of Home and Away, and it was definitely older than Eastern European democracy. The armrests were cracked, the seats an almost late-70's print, and the walls flocked with strange dollops of the national colours, red, white and blue.
What was most hilarious was the staff. They just didn't give a shit. The captain actually stopped talking half-way through the safety demonstration and the steward who told the row of passengers in the emergency exit row bascially said to them " You sit here, listen to me now. If we crash door will open, you will help and that is all." It obviously sounds much better in heavily accented english, but I think you get my drift.
Anyway, I obviously spoke too soon in my critique of the airline (linked inherently with national pride, langauge and the way of life) because on arrival almost half the plane's baggage had been left in Rome (clearly I wasn't the only one who found the plane amusing). I've been trying to call the airline, but I think that they are taking a traditionally long Eastern European lunch (why couldn't they invite us!?) and it doesn't connect.
No,of course I have checked that the number is the right one, etc etc!
But I'll be off to ring them again now.
ciaoski darlski

Es muß nicht immer Eurovision sein

2008-04-28T04:39:00.000-07:00

No, it's not always about Eurovision. Nor should it be. But right now, three weeks before finals week, it is.
There we go. A blog about Eurovision. Big deal, you say, or rather, not another Petra tangent about some random shit, but this time it's different. It's like queueing for the final Harry Potter book, getting tickets to the World Cup Final, New Order or an at-their-peak Oasis/Take That/Spice Girls/Monkees/ABBA (ha! not so tangential now!)/Liberace (depending on your taste, age and perspective).
I thought this sounded so good when i wrote it nearly two weeks ago, and it doesn't quite, but right now, I just want to go to sleep, being that I must get up in three and a half hours.
why won't the Eurovision files send?????
Please note that whilst I depart with a sack full of books, electrical cords, gadgets and small change, I also leave with a stash of two (not one!) feathered hats. They will feature throughout this blog (I presume), a constant within the tangential product of the (ever-changing) keyboard.
Japan beckons.
Good night.